I remember that day vividly. Sitting in the hospital room waiting on results of her MRI, seeing a case manager, ER doctor and our pediatrician walk into the room and ask us to walk across the hall to speak with them. Walking across the hall to a conference room to see them sitting at the table, pediatricians eyes were red and the mood somber. Having knots in my stomach and throat of what had been found on the MRI scans. The doctors words "There is no easy way to say this"..... "there is a fairly large tumor on her brain".
Thrown into a whirlwind of emotions, questions, thoughts and activity. Not knowing what was to come, only that we needed to get her into surgery as soon as possible!
The past year has gone by fast in some instances and other it has seemed like the days would not end.
Looking back on the last year and seeing just how far Cydney has come is amazing. She is a fighter and is not giving up. Relearning how to do everything has taken a lot of determination; it has meant overcoming pain, frustration and fears.
The year has been full of good days and bad days, hard days and easier days; days of sickness and days full of energy. There have been lots of laughs, tears, hugs and kisses and silent prayers. There have been countless doctors appointments, therapy sessions, hospital admissions, tests for hearing, kidney function tests, MRI scans, ultrasounds and lab work.
Cydney finished up Cycle 7 this week. Two more to go! End of treatment comes with its own set of emotions. The feeling of wanting life to go back to normal, but it is not as though things are all over as soon as treatment ends. There will still be years of therapy, scans and other tests, doctors appointments and a constant uneasiness whenever concerning symptoms arise.
Cydney will continue on in school this fall, going into 4th grade. We are looking to increase her to three days a week at first and increase time as her stamina allows. She has been doing summer homebound schooling in efforts to keep her on track and to keep the improvements coming.
I can't forget to mention how incredible Nathan and Lily have been through all this as well. From being sent to stay with our friends, whom they did not know, for a month as we got accustomed to Cydney's needs in the hospital and then living with constant change of who was home with them and who was in the hospital with Cydney. They have gone with the flow, made their own sacrifices in regards to time with us; sometimes needing to see the attention focused on Cydney and her needs more. They remain to build a strong bond with Cydney and I can see that sibling love in them. They are concerned when she is sick and not feeling well and excited to play when she has the energy to join in the fun.
We can't say Thank you enough to all the family, friends and community who have lent a hand, sent meals, prepared our home for Cydney's home coming and got the proper adaptions to the house made, sent cards, sent gifts to the kids, babysat, given advice or just being open to hear venting.
As we proceed through this next year, I can only hope to what her accomplishments will be and how much further she will come. I was talking to Cydney today and she told me " you know nothing is impossible, it may be hard sometimes but I can do it if I want!" Her outlook on everything is remarkable and while she is very self aware of what is going on and how she has changed, she is not down on herself. She often times jokes about when she gets sick. As it can happen at any moment, with little to no warning it seems. She is quick to joke about it happening and move on to what she was doing. I hope she can keep this attitude about life.
